This Sunday may have been Logan’s wake, but it was Marcia’s party. Was she shopping in Milan? Quite possibly, but was it for forever? Clearly not — because as the Roy family, friends, and vague associates gather in the late patriarch’s Upper East Side mansion, Marcia is back to drop one of the greatest lines in the history of this show:
“We’re calling Kerry a taxi to the subway so that she can go home to her little apartment.”
So, how do we get there? Let’s jump into Succession’s fourth episode of the season, “Honeymoon States.”
The Roy kids are going about their morning/mourning routines — which, for Shiv, consists of dissociating in bed. The only time she’s ever been relatable to me, honestly. Her contemplation is interrupted by her doctor, Sharon, who’s calling to deliver some good news about her amniocentesis. That’s right: as quite a few Successionistas (I won’t give up on making this happen) have been suspecting over the course of several refused cocktails, Shiv is pregnant. It’s difficult to tell from her facial expression how she’s feeling about the news. Regretful at getting pregnant by a man she’s now divorcing? Mournful at the reminder that Logan will never meet her child? Conflicted over whether she desires motherhood at all? I guess time will tell, but it certainly seems a more bitter than sweet moment.
On the Upper East Side, Kendall arrives at the wake in aggressively designer sunglasses that are now my favorite thing he’s ever worn. He immediately overhears Hugo being suspicious, talking to someone on the phone who is screwing him over in various ways that he details with some very specific sexual metaphors.
The second person he encounters? Marcia! Back from wherever she really was (she won’t say), and already offering her condolences in French. She also shares with Kendall that she and his father “spoke intimately every evening.” Gross! Shiv and Roman are equally yucked out by the prospect of those calls. But they don’t have much time to dwell on it — because in true Succession fashion, there is a board call in the next hour. There’s always a board call.
Once again, it’s Roy Kids Minus Connor vs. Everyone Who Was On The Plane Minus Kerry. The second group wastes no time — Frank delivering another all-time banger, “Would anyone care for… a look at the china?” — and pulls together a quick huddle to talk potential CEO candidates. Nearly all of them throw their hats in the ring, though none quite so formally as Tom. Also none so brutally and immediately taken down as Tom, with Karl telling him that the board would hypothetically call him “a clumsy interloper and no one trusts you.” Karl has really found his voice in a special way this season. That said, Gerri has a more subtle approach, telling Karl, “I think you’re a corporate legend. What you did in the ’90s with cable? Huge.” The queen of the backhanded compliment, I tell you. So, safe to say, this group isn’t meshing well.
Things aren’t going great for the kids either. They had screened a call from Mattson to give themselves time to strategize, but their move backfired — he is now refusing to speak with them, and instead wants them to fly to Sweden for GoJo’s “company strategy sesh” tomorrow. They try pushing back but… I think they’re gonna do it.
While all this back-room business is going on, there’s some front-room business happening. Foyer business, to be exact. Because Connor and Willa have arrived. After an immediate verbal spar between Marcia and Willa — Marcia complimenting Will on how far she’s come, and Willa immediately shooting back, “Well, look at us both. Right?” — Connor shares his intention to purchase Logan’s apartment when the time comes. The time, for Marcia, is now: she shakes on a $63 million sale right then and there. Because she is Marcia, and Connor is an idiot.
If the $63 million question is how quickly can Connor make a terrible financial decision without consulting his new wife, the $64 million question is about to be unearthed. Move over “Who killed Laura Palmer?” …the new television debate for the ages is now, “Was it crossed out or underlined?” In his role as executor of Logan’s estate, Frank unearths a piece of paper with some typed notes and pencil scribbles that were never shared with a lawyer. The notes include a few things (a cryptic “Greg??” being one of them), but the most notable is the naming of Kendall Logan Roy as his successor to be CEO of Waystar Royco. And both below and through that name: a pencil-drawn line. Underlining him or crossing him out?
Despite the paper being totally undated and having no legal standing, Kendall immediately becomes transfixed by his deep certainty that it was, in fact, an underline. All his work to get himself clean(-ish?) and step away from the business that even Frank acknowledges was killing him goes right out the window. It’s like he instantly reverted to the Kendall we knew in Season 1, his mind on becoming CEO and nothing else. His first step is to pull Stewy in, first for a tearful hug and then as his ally to convince the board to vote him in as interim CEO. Stewy somewhat reluctantly agrees. They’re bros! What can he do?
Not on board? Shiv. She is the first to question what the pencil mark is, and seems to take an immediate disliking to the idea of Kendall being recommended as CEO. It was almost her, after all — and she has the least involvement in the company, so the highest hill to climb to secure a spot on her own. And her alliance with her brothers was putting her in a real power position. She can’t dwell too long, because Tom shows up to deliver yet another series of devastating lines. I need Matthew Macfadyen back in a romantic period piece ASAP so I have someplace to channel these feelings. Shiv immediately starts making demeaning comments at her husband, to which he replies, “Don’t. You’ll regret it. Let me show you some kindness.” Is this really the man who very recently was using employees as foot stools? (Yes. It is. Please keep remembering that.)
He then attempts a trip down memory lane, which, let’s be real… I’m just going to quote in full because how could I summarize:
“Siobhan, do you remember when we first, uh, knew one another? The first time in France when I flew to you? And it was that very difficult time for you. And I’d sent you all those handwritten notes. And then the first time that you were wearing that very fine silk shirt, and I put my arm around you. And I said, I kept asking, ‘Do you like this? Do you like this? And you said, eventually, ‘I like it all.’”
I’m sorry, did Tom Wambsgans just take my breath away? Yes, they’re terrible people. Yes, he’s probably remembering this through $400 rose-colored lenses. Yes, this is probably to some degree a manipulative attempt to get back into the good graces of the Roys who are still breathing. But in a world where no one can express a single feeling without adding “fuck you,” this sudden bursting into near romantic prose just felt so good, and we’re allowed to feel that!
A few more guests arrive: Colin, with his child of whom the Roys were completely oblivious up until this moment; Sandi Furness; and her father Sandy, whose permanent smile the kids are not convinced is not due to his happiness at the occasion of Logan’s death.
And then, there’s Ron Petkus. Now, according to Stephen Root’s IMDb page, he was in fact in one other episode of Succession: last season’s conservative conference-centered, “What It Takes.” But you’ll forgive me for being distracted by an episode that also starred Reed Birney, Linda Emond, and Yul Vazquez — and raised the question of whether or not Roman and Jeryd Mencken explored each other’s bodies in the bathroom. So I was in shock when he showed up to give a ridiculously over-the-top eulogy of Logan (but to be honest, I’ll never complain about seeing Stephen Root show up in a thing).
Tom and Greg go full Statler and Waldorf making fun of him in the back, but we don’t get more than a couple of minutes of their banter. Normally I’d be sad about that, but in this case I rejoice: because Kerry has arrived. Marcia is poised and ready for the stand-off. She’s already had Kerry’s bag of pills and Fenty makeup packed up and brought downstairs, which Logan’s sobbing friend/assistant/advisor immediately drops all over the place as she blubbers about foiled wedding plans. Roman steps in to help, before Colin instructs a man named Billy to take Kerry “out the back,” which is maybe the most terrifying thing he’s ever said, and that is saying something!
Roman confronts Marcia about the harshness of her treatment, and at last, we get the line to end all lines:
“We’re calling Kerry a taxi to the subway so that she can go home to her little apartment.”
And the saunter away! In her little lace hat!
Calling a taxi TO THE SUBWAY! Not even the full ride!
Her little apartment!
Kerry will never recover from this and, frankly, neither will I.
Finally, Kendall calls his final huddle: his siblings. And no, that does not include Connor. Ken suggests that if he can get voted in as CEO, he can keep the power in the siblings’ hands, collectively. He points out that he’s the perfect mix for the board: “Same old, but with a vibey new banner.” One of the more Kendall sentences ever spoken. They’re not confident in him alone, so they agree on a package deal of Kendall and Roman. Shiv’s agreement is reluctant, and although she makes them promise she’ll have a role and that it will be a three-way split, she seems rightfully unsure of the solidity of this deal.
In case it wasn’t already clear that Succession is about everything that happens around the major events, we don’t even see the board call that we’ve been hearing about all episode. The scene simply cuts to Karolina announcing that the votes are in, and Kendall and Roman have been voted through as interim co-CEOs. And as if things weren’t sour enough for Shiv, she takes a hard tumble down the stairs in front of everyone — including the gently smiling Sandy.
Kendall and Roman’s first order of business is to decide on a communication plan. Up in Logan’s old office, they take a moment to soak it all in (and Roman takes a side moment to down some of dad’s pills). Then Karolina shares the options, one of which is to put out stories of Logan’s incompetence, billing the kids as his puppet masters who therefore are completely ready to take on the role they’ve already been doing behind the scenes. Together, the brothers are against it. Or as Kendall puts it, “Considering our dad has just died, we should maybe not shit on Dad.”
But individually, Kendall has other ideas. Earlier, Hugo gave him just an unbelievable amount of leverage — all but confessing to insider trading on Logan’s death, as his daughter sold all her Waystar Royco stock before the news went public. Kendall’s second order of business as co-CEO? Go behind Roman’s back and blackmail Hugo into sneakily enacting the “shit on dad” plan. As Kendall himself says, he’s doing what Logan would have done in the situation — and when he gives Hugo a killer’s smile, it seems he’s filling those shoes quite naturally.
While the days of “because my dad told me to” are now behind us, the present “it’s what my dad would have done” era might give Kendall even more dangerous free rein, lack of personal accountability, and delusion. And we have six more episodes to see just how far that goes.
