Humor, especially across cultures, is subjective. That’s why on this most recent globetrotting episode of Succession — titled “Kill List” — the show posed an interesting question: Is it a good joke to mail someone a half-liter frozen brick of your own blood? Let’s figure this out.
“Kill List” sees the Roy family traveling to Norway to sort out the final buyout of their family company by eccentric and intense billionaire Lukas Matsson. As Matsson bats around the brothers Kendall and Roman — taking time to play with his food before going in for the kill — he cozies up to their sister, who was finding herself pushed aside in the sale.
That’s when Matsson confides in Shiv that he’s “in a bit of a pickle.” It seems he may have crossed the line in how he handled a break-up with Ebba, who also happens to be his communications director.
“As sort of a nasty, friendly joke about what I shouldn’t do, I sent her some of my blood. A half-a-liter frozen blood brick,” says Matsson. “As a joke, obviously.”
He continues, “She got a bit weirded when I did that, but I just kept doing it. Again and again and again. And then it became not a joke. And then a joke again. And now it’s apparently not a joke.”
Matsson says he could just lawyer up and deny everything. Shiv points out that “Deniability is difficult given she has so much of your blood.”
Legalities aside, the real question is: Is this a good joke?
Well, one thing to consider is that mailing bodily fluids to your ex is not funny. That’s some real Jared Leto Joker energy. But there is more to this to consider.
First is the great length that one would need to go to get that much blood. A half liter is just over one U.S. pint. The Red Cross insists on donating a pint of blood no more than once every eight weeks. This means that, keeping Matsson’s physical well-being in mind, it would take him 24 weeks to produce four blood bricks. That’s half a year spent on a gag.
Then there are the logistics to consider. A pint of blood weighs 1.09 pounds or 496 grams. This exceeds Norwegian mailing service Posten’s standard letter weight limit of 350 grams for letters, so the blood bricks would need to travel by parcel service Norgespakke. I couldn’t find any restrictions that specifically stated you can’t ship frozen blood across Norway. Posten’s chatbot was unable to assist.
Matsson is a man of great means, so he would easily have the private medical and courier capabilities to arrange the harvesting and dispatch of the blood bricks. Even with that in mind, it’s still a long way to go for a joke, which somehow makes it funnier. And doing it four times… well, that almost gets into Simpsons rake gag territory.
So the question is was this fourth blood brick a subversion of comedy’s Rule of Threes? Or does it simply kill the bit? Or, and hear me out, is the Posten chatbot going to report me to Interpol for asking about the blood?
I look forward to the next episode of Succession to find out.
